Motherhood

Well, I have just completed my first week at work, they call it part-time even if you just drop seven and half hours. It was a hard four days, work have already messed up on my days off so I had to work four days in a row which meant I have missed spending quality time with George.

During that week, I was full of cold, everyone in the back office kept their distance due to my coughing, spluttering and constant blowing of my nose, when I left work, I felt rough and looked like Rudolf. Since having George, I’ve been sick so many times, still can’t shift it and have lost count on the times I’ve contacted the GP.

Had to take a carer’s leave day off, the week before as Georgie was sick and nursery couldn’t take him, at first I felt guilty when I had to call work, but now I don’t George comes first before work and I’m sure every parent would understand.

Out of all my friends, I only know one mum who gets to stay at home with their child, I thought first of all, how lucky to be able to afford that and be sane!

I spent most of my life working towards a career in nursing and now I need something more therapeutic where i feel valued, less knackered and I can see my children grow up.

We are so lucky in this day and age, after women sacrificed themselves, and some lost their families in the Suffragette movement, to give women of the future a Vote, Rights, and Choices to improve their lives. I think people have forgotten this as well as what life was like before a Free health service.

All these changes have which occured before I was born but have made a difference!

We are ” Family”

The fundamentals of family, to me is that, you chose to spend time with your family, listen to their wisdom, share stories of their lives, and laugh alot.

I didn’t emerge from a “nuclear family” who does, I came into this world kicking and screaming like most babes and my first memory is of my stuffed Rabbit and that I used to steal carrots from the larder. Then shortly after, my twin sisters arrived and life was merry, as we grew, I became bossier and my little sisters, well Annie became bigger.

I thought I knew my father, through his family, my nan, my aunties, even him. But how much do you ever know anyone? How honest are people?

One of my many flaws is that I am too trusting and caring, there are many times that I’ve been burnt through friendships and relationships.

The longing of a baby of my own, I was under the disillusion that this would bring my family back together, to some normality, that my father would be the father I always wanted and my mum would be ever fussing with all her grand-children.

I know its difficult these days now that families live in different counties or even countries, but families alway find a way to stay in touch.

Everyone wants to feel loved and cared for, to be special.

The year has passed …

Wow, I can’t believe George is now a year old, Lee and I have managed to survive the weeks and months of having our first child and we didn’t screw it up.

So many changes and hurdles we have experienced and overcome. The different emotions expressed from George, Lee and I. I feel we have become stronger in our relationship with one another and reached another level becoming parents.

My whole life now is interwoven with George in it, I found myself slightly lost the other day when he was at nursery and I had three hours to myself. Rather than revise for an exam, I have in a months time, I looked around the living room at George’s toys and wished he was there. I was looking forward to my half a mile walk in the rain to nursery to pick him up, when Lee called to say he could pick him up in the car. My heart sank that I couldn’t see his little face beam up to me when I entered the baby room. He would often squirm in whoevers arms he was in at the time, or if on the floor, begin crawling rapidly towards me, reaching up for a cuddle or grabbing my trouser leg.

My lifestyle and attitude has changed since having George, I am more understanding to other parents about the difficulties of juggling work and home, the constant worry you have for the safety of your child. Analysing every nook and cranny at home to ensure G isn’t going to wack his head or put his fingers in the plug socket.

I look at friends who haven’t got kids, and am not envious of their lives,  I have no regrets on how I have lived my life before and I am glad I have achieved most of my plans before having a child.

My first thought in the morning is George and last at night, checking he is breathing in his cot bed, making sure he is warm and tucking his arm by his side when it has slipped through the railings.

My favourite places these days are coffee shops and soft play, a combination of both is perfect, suitable for both George and I.  Today, I found a quirky little coffee shop with a collection of random chairs and a bookshelf with a range of mind boggling books. Although slightly expensive, it was a change from the commercial franchaise of costa.

I nearly broke a 1970s vase as I put my coat on. I inspected the place further by visiting the toilet which had vintage paper of men and women on the walls. I spotted a collection of vinyl and record player situated at the back of the shop looking like customers can put on a record if they wished. This is right up my street. Prior to leaving, I asked the lady who had served me if they had any highchairs as if it was something off the menu.

No soft play, but good music, food, coffee and highchairs!

Juggling starts …

Well, just as I thought this juggling lark is hard work! Thought work was going to be difficult, but wasn’t expecting to do Jury service,  for a two whole weeks!

George and I never really established a morning routine until we had to, oh my quads, having to march up the steepest hill in the morning and walking half a mile in the rain at 8.30am is not my idea of fun. Then getting to nursery and getting told they are not letting him attend as there are too many babies who have infections. I had to be in court an hour later, but my lovely hubby -to be came to my rescue and told me to bring him to his work and he’ll take him for the day and sort out the next day’s childcare.

What a relief, don’t know what I would have done if Lee couldn’t take over!

Glad jury service is over, such a strange experience and some of the people you meet on the jury, very judgemental and nieve.

Pwoor, how do parents work 9-5 full time, with children, mega-hard, missed my little Georgie, glad to have days with just Georgie and I.

Now today, we are chilling and I’m educating George on some good tunes – Green day!

 

End of the holiday …

Well, it was my first shift this week and despite their efforts to make it a shadow shift, that went out of the window, I was in the numbers and straight on an eyesight observations with a troubled teen! The ward has changed so much in a year, no smoking policy, no drug cards all online and a fairly new team!

Also I had the joy of taking my sick Georgie to nursery prior to going to work and having a mini argument with the finance person in nursery due to me bringing George in his pushchair! It was freezing outside and she wanted me to leave pushchair outside and then bring George in.When I eventually got G out of his pramsuit, I saw a big notice on the baby window stating some baby has contracted Chickenpox and that it will be doing the rounds. Great, that evening after I returned from work, I discovered a very hot George and spots all over his legs and arms.

Doing my research, this wasn’t the usual for pox, as it usually starts on their face and chest. Daddy took him to the doctors day after for clarification and to be informed it is just a viral rash and a common cold although he may get chickenpox as well. Also I discovered that Lee and I may get shingles if thats the case.

Rest of the week has been crazy, George had established crawling last week and now is EVERYWHERE, he follows me and has worked out how to open the stairgate through to the kitchen. However, he just sits at the gate and swings it so lucklier its not that bad.

I am now in the search of types of containment for each room, especially the bathroom so I can get a shower and not ran out and grab him before he crawls out of the door.

Four days left til the Apocalyse…

Well what can I say, think George and I have has a mavellous time together, managed to afford to take a year off and what a year it was!

From growing as a parent going through the spectrum of emotions, meeting other wonderful mums and dads going through just the same anxieties. Enjoying all the happiness and joy that Georgie has given us over the last ten and three quarter months!

Watching him change and grow into a little adventurer and clever one at that, when all the little ones were starting to crawl, George just gave us all the royal wave and we bowed at his creativity.

One of the skills, I think I have excelled at, is my creativity, it is one skill you can adapt to a range of jobs and raising children. I’m not into putting my little one in front of the tv, I get bored anyhow and feel that babies develop better with lots of playtime and stories.

Whilst being on my KIT days, (keeping in touch days) at work, which is something all mums/dads can do before returning to work. After you receive your last maternity stat pay, you can do up to ten days paid by your employer – this being any training, updates etc you need to do. It also helps you not feel under-confident and swamped when you return to work.

My time management has never been a strong point and for the last 5 years, I was always getting reminded by the boss about keeping up-to-date with my E-learning, now I have achieved nearly all of it in my KIT days, so I can concentrate on working with my patients.

Actually it felt quite nice being back at work, loads of changes but much easier than thinking about planning George’s day. Daddy has next week off to do all that while I have a full week at training, however minus the early morning wake-ups, it will feel like Respite.

The juggling will begin, offically when I start work, am still attending university part-time but it is fairly mild at the moment. An exam in March, will be exciting, just to add more craziness to the pot!

New year, new bra

Well, have shared ten months so far with my little pickle and experienced so many changes in my body, emotions, and relationships with all those close.

One of my acheivements was the success of breastfeeding.  Now I am weaning him slowly off and luckily not getting any of the awful infections which some of my friends have unfortunately experienced – mastitis or thrush.

My boobs have gone from a DD cup down four sizes, but it feels bloody good, trying on, and buying new attractive bras which are made for me and don’t have an alternative function.

It’s a new year, so of course a new me, back to work in two weeks, mixed feelings about this, thats when the real juggling begins. Although some days with George are exhausting and I wish I was at work, when I am with George, he amazes with his curiosity to all the little things we grown-ups take for granted.